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Do you think that something is wrong with you and you can fix it by losing some weight and dieting?

It’s great to feel inspired to lose weight and to feel healthier and more vibrant and active. But before we entrust our body to a weight loss regime, perhaps we need to question if the reasons that get us motivated to lose weight may be setting us up for failure.

We can listen to all manner of promises which give us hope for a quick and easy weight loss, and once we achieve our goal weight it will give us those things we desire – new life, new partner and the promise that our world will be wonderful, etc. These promises or suggestions can initially excite us, but we frequently find that in the long term they do not deliver what we want. Almost always there is still something missing even if we reach our goal; however, the fact is, most of us will not even reach the goal we set.

Could it be that the initial motivation for us to reduce our weight actually sets us up to be derailed from the outset?

When most of us start on a weight loss diet we have very high expectations as to how fast we will lose the weight. We may hold a picture in our mind that shows us exactly what will happen when we are slim or thin or drop that dress size – what clothes we will wear, how attractive and sexy we’ll be, how people will feel about us, especially the opposite sex. We have been bombarded by images from the media and magazines which run through our minds about how people will be bowled over by how gorgeous and amazing we will look when it happens. We’re sold the idea that being slim will give you the perfect life, but underneath this deception we know that the pictures we build frequently bear little resemblance to our day-to-day lives.

So we begin . . .

As one tip to get motivated to lose weight states:[1]

“It's Monday morning and you've promised yourself this time you mean it. For the next three days, it's nothing but salads, jogging, and protein bars. Then Thursday rolls around unexpectedly and you're plastered to the couch with a tub of Ben & Jerry's (ice cream). What happened? A lack of motivation, that's what. But don't worry -- if you put your mind to it, you can avoid the yo-yo diet and turn it into a yo-u look awesome diet.”

Ouch! What did happen? Did you have nothing but salads and protein bars? Did you hit the diet and weight loss section in the supermarket where everything is less than 100 calories per portion? Or . . .

Did you think that something is wrong with you and you can fix it by losing some weight and dieting?

Everything – the shelves of the supermarket, the magazines, other people’s opinions and even your own mind – is telling you that whatever is wrong with you can be fixed by dieting and the holy grail of weight loss.

To get motivated to lose weight, or in fact to begin any endeavour on the basis that something is wrong with us and we can set out to fix that, is set to derail us.

If we start on ‘Day One’ with this approach, everything we eat or don’t eat is confirmation or agreement that we are:

  • All wrong

  • Too fat

  • Not good enough

  • The wrong shape

  • Unattractive

  • Unworthy

  • Unhealthy

How many days can we function on an all-day tirade that we are all wrong?

We have no means of coping with this negative start to the day that sets us up to be less, no good and basically condemned from the outset. We can maybe stick it out in the short term but the continuous confirmation that we are not enough as we are undermines our sense of self-esteem and any feelings of wellbeing. It leaves us empty, flat and worse off than when we began. It’s no wonder the diet does not last.

Is there a magic key to weight loss? Are we missing the point in seeking one? Could we consider that we are enough as we are – right now, today, in this very moment. If you feel resistant to such a view then we could say that this is a trigger point for showing you what you can work on to support you in your life, for there’s no doubt that the power, love and care for yourself is in your hands.

If you were to consider that the world needs you to be all of you, loving and caring for yourself, and walking through life simply being all of you, could this be the truth? Let’s face it, you are unique, you have life experiences no one else has had. Like a diamond, you have different facets that are totally different to anyone else, and when you shine, your light is different to everyone in the world. There’s more to this however, for there will be huge numbers of people who will understand life from seeing you shine. The world is waiting for you.

Appreciating ourselves for who we are and what we bring is very important, it’s a part of our foundation, a base that we all need to build within us before we start to look at what food to eat or how to eat well. Making ourselves wrong from the outset or judging ourselves to be less is the very opposite of what is needed to nurture ourselves.

Appreciation and self-acceptance can support us to change our negative self-talk.

It does require a sense of purpose for seeing what is at stake here, which comes from the understanding of just how amazing, gorgeous, loving and caring we are and how much we need to develop these qualities. To support us we will need to connect to who we are and have a consistency and commitment to refuse to allow ourselves to be rubbished by the thoughts in our own head – that list of reasons we have about ourselves not being enough – but we can keep saying no to them and choose to make very practical and loving choices to care so tenderly for ourselves and accept our selves for being more than good enough SIMPLY AS WE ARE.

It is a fact that no matter what our weight, we are beautiful as we are.

Choosing to address our weight and lose weight from a place of self-acceptance means we are not making ourselves wrong and are not someone who needs fixing in order to fit into a world that expects us to be a certain way in order to be acceptable to our self and others.

This is not to inflate our sense of ego, but to accept we are already gorgeous, with a beauty within that we can connect to and build as our foundation going forward. We are enough, simply as we are!

It is great to lose excess weight and the true way to get and stay motivated to lose weight starts with our foundation of self love, self care, appreciation of what we bring to the world and an acceptance that we are enough as we are, before we start to make changes!

Reference:

  • [1]

    Health Care News and Trends. http://debhealthcare777.blogspot.co.uk/2014/03/weight-loss-motivators.html

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Self-nurturingAppreciationSelf-worthAcceptanceWeight loss

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    By Ariana Ray, BA (Hons), CQSW, DASS, PTA, ABE

    Born and raised in Wales but now emigrated to England, I discovered the joy of skipping with joy quite late in life. Working in the field of children's services and volunteering in diverse areas – I am loving life.