Discovering self-care and bringing it into my life
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Discovering self-care and bringing it into my life
Looking back over my life from where I once was to where I am today, here are some things that I have noticed about my relationship with self-care, self-love and appreciation:
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When I was given a very beautiful leather-bound diary, I didn’t know what to do with it. I could appreciate the leather cover but I felt it was wasted on me.
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I was given a small lovely timber framed hand-held mirror, the type you keep on a dressing table – I actually didn’t know what people used them for.
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In my thirties I used to watch a friend of mine prepare to get ready to go out. She would lay all her clothes on the bed with care, in the order she would dress. At that time I had no sense of the purpose of this ritual, in fact I used to think it was a bit over-the-top.
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Then there were all the times people took a proper break at work, went out for lunch etc. This seemed rather a waste of time to me, to simply stop and not do what I considered ‘anything’ productive. I didn’t have any real concept of sitting by myself to simply stop, rest and regather from being busy.
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How about the people who would actually have a rest during the day when they were tired? What was tired – was this another word for lazy?
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Then there were the women who had rest or sick days when menstruating. I so didn’t get that there was any need or merit to stopping. For me life went on regardless.
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Headaches: these were something that had to turn into a migraine to stop me. Usually painkillers would sort these out, so stopping to rest wasn’t necessary.
This is a short list of how I thought life was to be lived, not only for me but for others – I was conditioned to keep going no matter what. What didn’t feature in my life was any form of self-care. The role modelling I had experienced was one where to be sick as a child you really had to be seriously unwell. Nothing else was accepted. It was the ‘off to school – you’ll be ok’ policy.
I approached life in this way until I started attending Universal Medicine workshops and presentations. My life of constant doing had taken its toll on my overall wellbeing. I was exhausted and generally unwell, using a multitude of medical, complementary and alternative medicines and treatments to keep me going. After having Sacred Esoteric Healing sessions for about one year and beginning to deeply re-connect with my own body and the beauty that lived inside it, I realised there was a possibility there could be some true healing available: however I first had to take a step off the ‘fix me please’ approach and onto the ‘I’m going to start to take some true responsibility for my own healing’ path.
The way I had lived seemed quite normal to me. I had no concept that in fact I was living in a way that was disregarding of me and of everyone else. The way I lived was also similar to many other people; live hard, play hard, get up and do it all again. I can now feel how living like this doesn’t only hurt me physically but it hurts on the level that gets into our thoughts by the fact that it is lacking the true love and honouring we all are so naturally worthy of and which shines through us when we choose to self-care.
These days life is so very different in the way I care about me, knowing that how I am with myself and what I do to myself matters immensely.
As a result, the after – which is forever unfolding – now includes:
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Feeling totally worthy of having and using beautiful special items as part of my everyday.
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Having mirrors and knowing exactly what they are for, especially appreciating my reflection.
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Preparing my clothes before a shower is now my everyday ritual. There is something very honouring about the ritual of laying out what feels confirming of the beauty of me and is expressed through the way I dress.
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It’s taken a long time, but I usually have a break at lunchtime now. It is so rejuvenating, simply a basic support for our bodies.
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Resting during the day – this is a work in progress but I have learnt that the world doesn’t stop because I do, and what I have also learnt is that neither have I missed anything, I’m simply more refreshed for whatever is next.
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Having rest days when menstruating is the most self-loving opportunity, not one I got to fully realise for myself as I am now menopausal; however, I absolutely understand and appreciate the true purpose of this now.
Headaches only come now to get my attention that I’m thinking too much, not breathing my own breath and that I have lost my connection to myself. These days I stop and check in with myself to see what I’ve actually been doing in autopilot at the expense of my body.
These all might seem like tiny blips on the radar of life, scarcely worth the mention, however, the reality of these seemingly subtle changes has brought an absolute change in my self-worth, self-care, self-nurturing and love, aspects of my life that simply weren’t activated and lived before. A life that was lived in disregard and at times in harming ways, is now lived with an honouring of the gentle, precious woman I am.
Universal Medicine offers and presents Healing Modalities based on the Teachings of the Ageless Wisdom. These days I count myself as a student of these teachings, as I am learning much about living the true basics of life, which are to deeply honour and care for ourselves, whereas before I used to think that self-care was a weakness; for sick people or wimps.
I love growing older, wiser and more loving of myself and everyone, with the amazing reflection and support from others who also choose to live a life with self-care, nurturing and honouring as our everyday approach to life.
Filed under
Ageless Wisdom, Livingness, Self-love, Therapies, Universal Medicine
