Dressing to appreciate me – not to fit in to an ideal weight or to hide my body shape

Dressing to appreciate and celebrate my body, not to fit into an ideal weight or body shape

Dressing to appreciate me – not to fit in to an ideal weight or to hide my body shape

Now in my mid to late 60’s, the style of clothes I love to wear has changed completely. Previously my clothes were always baggy and shapeless so I could hide myself underneath them, so as to not to stand out or be seen – there was an entrenched belief that I had to be an ideal weight or body shape to be acceptable. Now I love wearing figure-hugging garments that have a lovely feel on my skin.

These changes have come about since being a student of Universal Medicine and life – my choice of clothes now offering another reflection of the support and inspiration from the Ageless Wisdom Teachings, to re-turn and come back to the real me, which is love, and to live with joy.

The key choice I made to bring about this change was bringing acceptance to, and appreciation of, myself and my body, with all of its various curves, without needing to fit with what was perceived as ‘fashionable’, ‘sexy’ or the ‘ideal’ weight or body shape that fashion magazines and society, etc, perpetuated: this was the beginning of a big change for me – not thinking I had to conform to this.

Sometimes I choose to wear my skirts shorter now – on or even above the knee, instead of lower mid-calf length or longer. When I am accepting my body it is not important what anyone else thinks about my knees! Recently, feeling playful, gorgeous, cheeky and sexy, I chose to wear a short (mid-thigh!) skirt and, once getting over the newness of this, it felt I was celebrating ALL of me when I wore it – dressing to honour the way I felt within myself at that moment.

This shows me the difference when we dress for our self and what feels true, rather than what it may look like to others. When I dress for me, loving and appreciating my natural weight, body shape and curves, I feel radiant, playful and so graceful, and this is what is unexpectedly expressed back to me by others.

This is a marker of how I am appreciating and celebrating my body now, in such a way that I am taking much more care of it than I ever did, from a deeper awareness of how I feel inside – my weight and body shape are no longer things I need to hide.

"True beauty is found in how you feel, not how you look."

Serge Benhayon Esoteric Teachings & Revelations, p 96

Prior to commencing my study with Universal Medicine I would constantly look outside myself for answers. With my radar vigilantly scanning to ensure all was safe around me, I could read something a mile off that might be confrontational or challenging to deal with – and knew exactly how to avoid it! I put a lot of pressure on myself (especially my nervous system), and by continually safeguarding and protecting myself against what I perceived might attack me, exhaustion was the norm.

My clothes reflected this – hence the shapeless, baggy clothing to try to hide and thus protect myself.

In fact, the truth is now clear – I was attacking myself with this behaviour of putting impenetrable walls up around me. I used food as a means to numb my awareness and my beliefs around weight and body shape to separate me from people. These fed a constant cycle of thoughts of self-doubt, self-loathing, unworthiness, ‘nothing to offer to others or the world’, and sometimes even thoughts on how much easier it would be to go to sleep and never wake up again.

From regularly attending Women in Livingness groups with Natalie Benhayon and Sara Williams, I was inspired to begin a deep level of self-healing to break down the armour plating, fear of being seen, disregard, self-loathing, heavy-duty seriousness and, (from the dreaded world of comparison), feeling less than others. The groups often confronted my beliefs and ideals around what it meant to be a woman in this world. I was so used to running myself down – criticising myself much of the time, even sometimes loathing myself – as a result of those ideals and beliefs.

However, in this truly supportive environment I began to slowly feel the truth: that it really didn’t matter what my weight and shape were – what mattered was loving and appreciating the woman I am. The ideals and beliefs, especially around my body shape and weight, fell away and I began to make different choices and permanent changes in my daily life – banishing the overt seriousness, the self-bashing and the sense of separation from others, and re-awakening my joy within. (Alleleuia!!)

It seems as if I am seeing with ‘new eyes’ from inside my body, rather than the stress of constantly looking outside of myself for protection, acceptance and recognition. So I no longer wear clothes to seek approval from others, or to fit in with some ideal weight, ideal body shape or fashion. Nor do I wear clothes to hide my inner beauty and natural curves. I have a deep appreciation of the choices and changes I have made and continue to make.

I now have a greater freedom of expression, true confidence, and a natural acceptance of who I am on the inside – an absolute knowing that I am from Love and that harmony, stillness and joy are a natural way of being.

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Accepting your imperfections and grandness

This beautiful audio about acceptance presents how by accepting your imperfections you get to accept and experience your awesomeness!


Filed under

AcceptanceSelf-empowermentConfidenceSexinessJoyBody positiveBody image

  • By Stephanie Stevenson, Esoteric Yoga presenter, Esoteric Modalities Practitioner, EPA Recognised

    Complementary Practitioner of Universal Medicine Modalities. Presenter of Esoteric Yoga and True Wellbeing sessions. Local Hospice Volunteer, as part of the Complementary Practitioner team.

  • Photography: Clayton Lloyd