Claiming your body’s natural intelligence during pregnancy and childbirth
Claiming your body’s natural intelligence during pregnancy and childbirth
As women there is an innate wisdom within us when it comes to pregnancy and childbirth. This is there for every woman, no one more or less then another, but for many women this vast well of natural intelligence has been lost from sight as they have journeyed through life. Connecting to our wisdom starts from that place of inner quiet and from there can be nurtured into a deep stillness that is beyond words. It is this place of simply knowing what is going on and what is needed that can inform our pregnancies and all other experiences in our lives.
So how can a woman who is pregnant, or preparing for pregnancy, tune into this innate wisdom and make this a very real and lived experience from the time of pre-conception to birth and beyond? The answer lies simply with our bodies. The truth is our bodies were designed to hold this intelligence and even though some women may choose not to physically give birth in this life, and others may for medical reasons be unable to conceive, there is still within us all a natural ease and knowing, no less and no more for any woman.
Pregnancy offers the perfect opportunity for women to re-establish this connection with their bodies and their inner wisdom. It is all about surrendering; understanding that your body is now also a vehicle for another to enter this world and that there is a beautiful joy and responsibility in this.
A woman will often feel more sensitive to what is going on within and around her during this time. She may notice she’d like to eat certain foods. She may feel to rest at times she hadn’t felt before. She may feel her exercise or even how she moves in general needs to change. All of these things are examples of the body’s natural communication and intelligence and will all have an impact on yourself and the ‘being’/child growing within you.
Likewise, throughout pregnancy there are many moments where a woman will/can feel the child communicating with her. Sometimes this will be through movement such as a gentle kick or a little nudge, and at other times it is simply a feeling or sense that we have from the child. Both cases reveal the beautiful intimacy that is possible between the woman and child whilst they are still in the womb.
Knowing that this back and forward communication is occurring can take the experience of pregnancy to a whole other level. Similarly, as the birth approaches the body starts to prepare itself in the most wonderful way. Surrendering to this process asks a woman to let go of any expectations or preconceived ideas about when the birth will take place, or how it will happen, and this too is a natural part of the deepening that is on offer during this time. Do we stop and allow ourselves to feel the wonderment of what is happening during these moments – or do these occasions pass us by without us realising what is being offered?
Pregnancy gives a woman permission to tap into the endless well of intelligence she carries within; to listen to her body and respond with joy and purpose. This intelligence, which we can otherwise call our innate wisdom or knowing, is with a woman from birth and yet the reality is that for many women, ‘ease’ is not a word they would use to describe their experience of pregnancy and childbirth.
The answer to this is twofold. Many women today have lost connection to their inner wisdom, having stopped listening to their body’s communications at some point throughout their childhood or adult lives and instead opting to seek outside of themselves for answers. Be this in books, education or the thoughts and opinions of others, it has become commonplace for us to place more value on learned ideals and beliefs than our own inner feelings.
These ideals and beliefs never stop coming towards a woman her whole life. If it isn’t pregnancy, it’s mothering, or body image, or how we should be in bed. It’s in what we should eat, how we should exercise, how to dress etc. and, whilst it’s not a crime to give another guidance or support when they are unsure of something, it is for a woman to feel if these things are true for her or not.
"The more you go into your inner-most, the more you expand out the vast love and wisdom that reside within."Serge BenhayonTeachings & Revelations for The Livingness Volume III, ed 1, p 166
The internal conflict women can go through during pregnancy is unfortunately all too common. My story, where ideals and beliefs from the outside world conflicted with the ease and knowing of the inner world, is one that many women could relate to.
When I was 25 years old I fell pregnant with my first child. I remember specifically the night I conceived. After making love with my partner, I went into the bathroom and sat quietly looking out the window at the stars. This was a moment of deep stillness and connection with myself when a voice spoke very loudly from within saying, “You just got pregnant”.
There was such an absoluteness in this knowing that taking the test a week or so later was simply to confirm what I already knew to be true. I was having a baby. Of course, this brought up a lot of mixed feelings. I was young, my partner and I were in fact no longer together (another story) and he was soon to be heading overseas to live full time. But for me at the time there was no question of what to do – I was having a baby.
In the beginning stages of the pregnancy I experienced a lot of joy and an ease with everything I was feeling. There were times when I felt anxious about doing this ‘on my own’, especially having not yet established myself financially, but on the whole I felt quite settled with what was occurring in my body. I felt a connection to a wisdom deep within and I was quietly confident that I would be more than okay.
During the pregnancy I often had moments where I felt deeply still. There were no instructions telling me what or how I should be, I just felt completely surrendered in myself. These were also the moments that I felt very connected to the child growing within me. I could feel her presence so strongly, and what started out for me as subtle communication was in the end a very deep communication that was absolutely otherworldly but at the same time very real and tangible.
During the middle and end phases of the pregnancy I would take myself on long walks where I nurtured this feeling. The settlement I felt during these walks was so beautiful that I made sure I did this every day as part of my daily routine. Those walks were like stop moments, away from the chatter and the busyness of my working day. I also noted this was when I felt most connected with my daughter.
What was communicated to me on those walks was mostly to let go and trust in myself. There was a voice inside me saying, “You know how to be with this, you have it all inside of you.” These moments of deep connection and settlement were very profound, however I wasn’t able to consistently hold this depth and connection to my body throughout my days, and as the pregnancy progressed I noticed they became a minority feeling in amongst everything else.
Moving into the second and third trimesters and things started to challenge this ease and confidence. Slowly, I started to feel more and more overwhelmed with all the information I was receiving, not only from medical professionals, but from friends and family as well. All the ideals around pregnancy, all the ‘must do’s’ were constantly tugging at me, doing battle with this ‘other’ feeling of ease that I was so enjoying yet couldn’t seem to hold on to for any great length of time.
The ideals around pregnancy came dressed in many different packages – a barrage of information that was telling me how to be pregnant, the best things to do, what to eat, how I should be exercising etc. Hearing some of these things at times led to me doubting myself and my own feelings. This barrage lasted right up until the day I gave birth – then it became about how to be a good mother (also another story).
Looking back now I can see how I undermined my own feelings and instead did what society was telling me was the ‘right thing’ to do. How much did I do this in other aspects of my life?
I allowed the beliefs and ideals to slowly wear me down to at times end up feeling quite unsure of myself. It has taken many years to see that I wasn’t a victim in this and that indeed I played a role in my own disempowerment. Yes, it is horrible that women (of all ages) are subjected to ideals and beliefs that take us away from our innate wisdom, but I came to realise that it is we who allow this to become our reality. And therefore, just as we have given ourselves over to these ideals and pictures, often without realising it, we also have the ability to claim ourselves back.
"A woman's body flows naturally in the stillness of her grace when it is un-imposed by the rigours and onslaughts of our imbalanced world."Serge Benhayon Esoteric Teachings & Revelations, Volume I, ed 1, p 526
Our bodies are truly amazing and naturally intelligent, and regardless of whether we resist or embrace this, the invitation for us as women to deepen in our relationship with our body throughout pregnancy and beyond is never ceasing. Each time we honour what we feel, we are building a foundation that we can keep coming back to and the more we do this, the stronger the connection becomes to the true wisdom within us.
"Listen and do not ignore what the body communicates to you in every moment. And if you listen then there is no need to explain the magnificence of what this means."Serge Benhayon Esoteric Teachings & Revelations, Volume II, ed 1, p 403